Of course, we’d love for this skill to develop on its own. However, more often than not, it’s something like, “What do you mean dressing themselves? Even with my help, there’s a meltdown. What’s worse, the socks were just on the baby, and now they’ve exploded across the room because while I was reaching for the sweater, they’ve already managed to take them off.” Well, that’s expected. However, the child will gradually get used to the process of dressing itself and the idea that they can do it independently. And how to make this happen? The Montessori approach gives us some guidance.
Montessori Education and Dressing
The Montessori system is generally built to give children the opportunity to perform many practical tasks with minimal help at first, and eventually independently.
The secret to Montessori dressing consists of several components:
-
Prepare the environment. The room, hallway, and other areas should be adapted so that the child can physically dress themselves. For example, in the entryway, there should be a small kids' garment rack for scarves, hats, caps, shoes, etc. The child can easily access these when getting ready to go outside. Choose low wardrobes and cabinets at the child's height to ensure the space matches the toddler’s physical capabilities.
-
Show how to do it step by step. What seems obvious to an adult can be a whole science for a child. Similarly, for parents, the question of “how to teach a child to dress themselves” is something to approach with clarity. Use simple, understandable language and break the process down into manageable steps. For example, instead of simply saying "put on your t-shirt," you could say, "First, take the t-shirt, then put your arms into the sleeves, and finally pull it over your head."
-
Allow practice. The more practice a child gets, the better they’ll remember the sequence of actions until dressing becomes automatic.
-
Let them make mistakes. Montessori dressing means that even if the attempt doesn’t succeed, the child is not criticized, scolded, or told something like, "Even the cat could have figured it out by now, but you still can’t do it."
-
Support and praise what went well. Notice even small progress and celebrate it.
Prepared Environment
Montessori dressing is a process that takes place in a structured, child-centered environment. This means that the child can reach the shelves and hangers, take their clothes, and put them back in place independently. Prepare a kids garment rack, wardrobes, and cabinets at the child’s height. This will allow the child to easily reach the shelves and take clothes for themselves. In our article on Kids Closet Ideas, we discussed in detail which wardrobe and shelving options are best suited for children's closets and which solutions work most effectively. In particular, we provided examples of successful options, such as the Montessori Dresser, Toddler Wardrobe, etc
The harder it is for the child to access a box or drawer, the less likely they are to use it. Therefore, all solutions should be as simple as possible. An open kids garment rack will allow the child to see everything stored on the shelves, making the process of choosing clothes not a "treasure hunt."
Then, organize clothes by category so the wardrobe is easier to navigate. For example, place pants on one shelf, t-shirts on another, and underwear on a separate shelf or in a drawer. You can even add thematic stickers to each shelf to help the child navigate between them.
Tips and Helpers
All parents face the challenge of teaching children self-dressing skills, so there are many tips available on this topic. Here are a few proven and truly effective ones.
Be Patient
When you're told that everything will be easy and quick, just “follow steps 1, 2, 3” – that’s not always the case. Some things will be easier, others more difficult. Sometimes, the toddler might just be in a bad mood and want to dress, neither independently nor with help. Therefore, take care of yourself, and make sure you’re well, so you have the strength and patience to take care of your little one.
Choose Easy-to-Wear Options
Clothes should be comfortable, easy to put on and take off, and ideally fastened with simple mechanisms like Velcro tape or a zipper. This helps children practice fine motor skills without getting frustrated. For example, pants with an elastic waistband are easier to pull on than those with buttons. Shirts with large neck openings and stretchy fabrics also make it easier for the child to dress and undress. Be sure that every piece of clothing is not only beautiful but also comfortable. Avoid clothes that are too tight, too loose, or uncomfortable, as this may hinder them from trying to dress themselves.
Fold and Hang Clothes Together After Laundry
This helps the child remember where each item is stored – which shelf or hanger holds which clothes. It also helps the child become familiar with the variety of clothes they have and what they might want to wear.
Dressing Songs
On YouTube, you can find many dressing songs. Rhythmic, easy-to-remember songs that describe what to do step by step help children learn to dress themselves. The song becomes a helpful guide. For example, when heading outside, your child might sing “Put on your shoes, your jacket, your scarf,” and gradually dress step by step. There are also fun songs for tying shoelaces.
Pretend Play Helps
First, the child can try dressing their doll, which will help develop fine motor skills and provide an additional opportunity to practice. Second, you can set up a home fashion show! Lay a runway in the room and let your child choose the clothes they would like to wear as they walk down the homemade catwalk. You can give the fashion show a theme: for example, clothes for a walk, clothes for going to kindergarten, clothes for a birthday party, and so on.
Don’t Do It All for Them
Instead, use positive reinforcement. Yes, when you're in a rush and every second counts, sometimes you have to help quickly to avoid being late. However, when there’s time, like when you’re getting ready for a walk at a relaxed pace, let them try to do it independently, avoiding the temptation to do everything for them. Say something like, “You’re doing great trying to fasten your shoes on your own! Look how well you're doing!” This will boost their confidence and encourage them to take more initiative.
As you can see, Montessori dressing is not a quick-fix system where instant results are achieved. However, Montessori dressing is an approach that allows the child to confidently and successfully move towards independence, and self-care, and one day, you’ll see that your little one can truly do it all by themselves!
